Precious moments

Every precious moment that we live
Is gone in a second
Every emotion that we feel
Should never be forgotten

We live so fast, to die so young
Not stopping to listen,
to the bird's morning song

Everyday we trod on by
Dwelling over our own sad cries
Not realising what we miss
The breeze in the air, a gentle kiss

To our family and friends
The ones who are with us 'til the end
Through ups and downs and all between
What we never say can always be seen

Our love for our close ones never end
Through spirit, my whole heart I will send
Though I never say but always feel
I love them all beyond what is real

For my baby that I love
Who came to me from above
To bring me out of my dark storm
Into sunlit gardens at my dawn

A simple breath, I appreciate
The chance to live and see the days
What is given to me, precious and dear
I try to take without no fear

Beautiful Sunday Afternoon

On a beautiful Sunday, afternoon

After all the hard days, gone so soon

Terrifying pain

Mortifying sorrow

Overworks your brain

But let your heart just follow

On a peaceful Sunday afternoon

The birds go by and leave their tune

Let your worries fly just for a while

Can’t we simply smile, and let all slide

Listen to your heart

            when it’s open wide

Shut out your mind

            when  it’s cramped inside

Believe in the life that you have

What else is left, when it’s all gone by

A couple of poems

I was too scared to put these up before but here i am and here they are.

Rotten Fruit

A rotten relationship

Is what was left

Of what started out

As an adventurous lift

I hung on, clinging

To something dead and rotting

I tried to water and take care

But it dried up and died

Nevermind what I tried

We didn’t look forward to seeing each other

Knowing an argument was just around the corner

Our smiles, hugs and all was fake

Pretending to feel for each others’ sake

We let it go on

For way too long

We had to say goodbye

But always decided to try

My mind falls apart

The bleeding of my heart

Your frustrate me, aggravate me

What I want, you cannot give me

Numb

I get high to numb myself

But feelings creep back in

I try to forget you

Thinking that’s how I’ll get through

I cannot face it

I’m scared I could lose it

An empty feeling grows inside

A massive part of me has died

I want to push you away to forget

But it doesn’t work that way I regret

I can’t face it

I’m so scared

My mind brings you out

In my nightmares

I want to forget

But it’s too long to kill yet

I don’t want to feel

What I’m feeling inside

I don’t want to think

I don’t want to cry

I’m about to explode

But no one knows

I’m about to crack

And never look back

I’m losing my mind

My head is numb

Too much thinking

When nothing can be done

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Once again, thoughts twirl round and round in my head

I try to chase them away, but think even more instead

Many once started, over and gone

What do I keep doing wrong?

The pattern of a childhood

Is in no way new

Hope given that things could be different and better

But once again I find myself cold, with no shelter

Loneliness drove me to sway

I couldn’t stand the thought of another day

No one to hold me

No one to warm me

Cold nights, empty days

What did I think I’d gain

More emotional trouble

Now seems to have doubled

Take care of my heart

What is needed to start

I came here alone

To make something of me

I’ll leave here alone

Something made of me

I’m back again to a place I just can’t get out of

I’m falling again, drowning soul without love

Is it that I can’t see what’s given to me

Or is it real that there’s no one but me?

I’m all alone, again

It’s all been done, again

When I was climbing up the hill

I didn’t see the way I’d fall down

When I finally had the will

It all just came crashing down

When everyone around me, doesn’t seem to care

I just want someone to show me, that I’m really there

Don’t ignore me

Don’t look at me

Don’t scrutinize me

Why do you stare at me?

How should I know?

How should I know?

If  you cannot tell me

It means you don’t feel it

If you cannot show me

Your love no more exists

Why stop holding me

With small gestures of affection

You only professed your love

When on the verge of rejection

Even then you cannot say

Your refusal stands in the way

Why should you tell me

I should know

How the hell can I know

When you won’t ever show

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For all that I lack

Be rid of me

This thing that held you back

Is no more, and you’re free

Returned Love

All I wanted, was love in return

To feel wanted and let the fire burn

To be treasured

And made to feel precious

Not an annoyance

You cannot be rid of

Maybe I loved you more than you did me

I was blind and could not see

The man I gave so much of my time

Returned to say he had none for mine

We were right

For a while

My life to not steal

Your help was to heal

But it came at a price

This unpure advice

How, Why did you miss me?

In your day, did you stop to think of me?

Relax

Relax

Or you’ll face facts

Slow down Slow down

Un-crease your frown

Unwind

Freedom of mind

Rest Rest

Life should be blessed

Marching Matchstick Models

Marching matchstick models

Marching matchstick models

Walking without vowels

Too late

Un-imitate?

Marching matchstick models

Covered with wet towels

Time to celebrate

Ribs inflate

Marching matchstick models

Catwalks cover foul smells

Melting fever towels

Marching matchstick models

Crystal Clear Betrayal

Crystal clear betrayal,

trapped in a glass

Thrown on the ground

With a shattering sound

I watch the shards

As they hit the tiles hard

Crystal diamonds

            flying in the air

Cleansing it, releasing me

Light shining through

Releasing rotten truth

Smash

Hear the crash

Splaying sharp shard

Sprayback cuts me

            but fulfils me

I cleanse all the energy

            trapping me

Cut diamonds

Release the leashed lion

Let her roar

Let her heart soar

Betrayal burns inside

Betrayed fire consuming

How much more abuse

Can this heart take

How much more ache

Until it breaks?

Release me

Crystal tinkling

Beautiful twinkling

The force of the mighty tiger

Breaks free, uncaged

            foregoing danger

Break it

Throw it

Thrash it

Smash it

Open it

Light shines from it.

Run the Mania

Dysfunctional
Useless
Inspirational
Distress

Head in the hand again
No way to stop the train
My mind is high strung
With poison in me stung

I'm running the gauntlet
Each hit I don't regret
Over obstacles hop
But when will it stop

Grab the gun
It seems fun
Blow the brains out
In my silent shout

Made

Loneliness drove me to sway

I couldn’t stand the thought of another day

No one to hold me

No one to warm me

Cold nights, empty days

What did I think I’d gain

More emotional trouble

Now seems to have doubled

Take care of my heart

What is needed to start

I came here alone

To make something of me

I’ll leave here alone

Something made of me

untitled

Hatred and anger stabbed his heart

Words that hurt to make me fall apart

The once before amitie far gone

Replaced by vengeful fire so fond

I’m bleeding again

      bleeding already

I don’t need more wounds

      to keep me steady

My soul abated beyond repair

Skinned alive, a touch my flesh can’t bear

Wounds opened and bleeding free

Scars revisited

Same cuts

Same lives

They’ll be

untitled

The threat, the break of a head

The passion, until I am dead

I’ll never touch a woman

Hard caress contests confession

A trampled heart extorts last blood

Salt water heals and creates a flood.

Why?

Why?

The caring you show

It scares me to know

You care and wait ‘til my heart can mend

Refusing pressure to reach the end

Where’s the criticizing,

the using, the dicing?

of my very being

Scared and nervous

Bearing vulnerable callous

My own mind and heart

I fear will tear me apart

The Solution

To you I should be happy

One tear drop, and now you’re angry

I don’t understand

Why you don’t understand

Words roll in my mind

A solution I try to find

Relations live to exist?

Without misery, only bliss

But I’m more complex than that

You don’t know what it’s like

Sorrow comes with tears

Happiness also fears

My breath dies away with my mind

The solution I did not find

Love's Incision

Time doesn’t take away the tight clasp of love’s grip

My soul I laid bare that now is stripped

You’re in my thoughts every waking hour

When asleep, you’re my heart’s deepest desire

I need you out of my mind

A victim’s heart in cruel love’s design

Battered and bruised, I stagger away

Blood drips down my chest

I try to fight fate.

The tears don’t stop falling

They encircle my cheeks

My eyes won’t stop hurting

Of sadness, they speak

Throw onto me cruel decision

Through my heart and soul,

You’ve made a deep incision

Tomorrow's Time

Tomorrow’s Time

Tomorrow when I look at today

I’ll regret the time I’ve thrown away

In thoughts and feelings of guilt and shame

I’ve made a mistake, but it’s all the same

To my heart I will agree

Should have stopped as it became ugly

I accept my mistake

But won’t throw time away

No guilt and shame

Not anymore today

Lonely story

Loneliness creeps in, from under the door

As sure of misery, as night will fall

The feeling of separateness cannot be explained

No comfort by myself, I’m going insane

The air brushes cold past my skin

No human warmth to shield my soul within

Tired, red eyes tell a sad story

With a conclusion of despair.

Heart's ache

Heartbroken

Over a love long forgotten

Roses and soft kisses gone

Treasuring me as a precious stone

His words no longer express

That he’d change my world,

and clean up the mess

What he feels

He cannot reveal

How will I know

If he doesn’t show

He refuses to tell

Words to make it well

His frustration

Uncalled for aggravation

Love was once, but not again

Mourn it well while in the pain

Don’t forget the joys and smiles

Before the times they decide to hide

Mourn what is gone

But never forgotten

Appreciate and embrace

What is to be learnt

            from heart’s ache

Angels' patience

The angels ask me patience

For soon will come radiance

Hard to believe when you are useless

Apparent recovery progress

Look at my images, my words

Their appearance to me hurts

Running feels and urge

I don’t even know what will purge

I ask for comfort in my state

I ask for guidance before it’s too late

Whispers of Shouts

Hear the whispers of the shouts

Fear the sayings from the mouths

Delusional thoughts that say

Close your ears and look away

Hallucinating words and thoughts

I clutch to what I brought

Obsessive to the Core

Obsessive to the core

Only wanting more and more

Ironically less and less

Perfection is a mess

Reflections of distaste

Look away, from the hate

Thoughts run over and over

Nothing, unable to cover

Obsessive to the core

Vanity keeps me sore

Courage the Manic and others

Courage the Manic

Reality and the mind mingle

Insanity slow trinkles

Admit yourself to be manic

What maims the mind into panic

Misunderstood is what they’ll see

Strange stares directed at me

Rushing reeling ramblings

Thoughts and words are scrambling

Solid walls I climb, clawing

Somethings over me crawling

As I scratch, my mind just rattles

My demons I have to battle

Exorcise me the mindful priest

Help me overcome the growing beast

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Bricks on eyes that force them down

Twilight of closing eyes that moves the ground

In corners shapes and sounds are betrayers

Creeping up on you, imaginary slayers

Peripheral vision

Postulate delusion

The last snap shut of eyes

Make sure to obliterate the lies

Inviting softness of engulfing wings

Protection from slicing scenes

The motherly touch that we all miss

Rest my soul with a goodnight kiss

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Eyes that weep

Elusive sleep

Exhausted mind

Rest cannot find

Red strobing lights

Eyelids given fright

Hot and painful mind

The kind I anger at

Brains, my teeth grind

Heating up to contract

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Splintered mind all over, still one

Battle with the plaster that can’t be won

My mind runs a marathon

Thoughts hop on and on

Rest is shrillingly shunned

As my world has shrunk

Zooming zany insane

Wondering what’s wrong with my brain

Happiness that is pain

Here I stop again